Unveiling the Mystery Behind Why We Fall in Love

Love is a complex emotion that has been the subject of poems, songs, and stories for centuries. From Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet” to modern-day rom-coms, love has been depicted in countless forms. But what makes us fall in love in the first place? Why do we long for this intense emotion and experience bliss and heartbreak?

According to psychotherapist Dr. Nicki Nance, human pair bonding is driven by our innate desire to keep the species going. Throughout history, relationships were formed based on need, but over time they evolved into relationships built on enjoyment. Falling in love is now a socially defined concept, and while it may not happen without love stories to set the expectation, people would still bond with others. A successful contemporary love relationship is often built on three key components: passion, companionship, and commitment.

The brain and body also play a significant role in why we fall in love. When we fall in love, we enter a state of limerence, or infatuation or obsession, which is driven by our brain’s drive for pair bonding. The presence of a sincere love interest causes a release of hormones and neurotransmitters such as serotonin, endorphins, and dopamine, which provide a sense of well-being and pleasure. The release of these hormones and neurotransmitters serves as a reward, making us want more.

However, not everyone finds love easily. Sometimes, those seeking love unconsciously get in their own way. According to psychologist Dr. Beverly Palmer, in order to find love, one must first be able to give love and have a sense of self-love. Those who do not feel worthy of love often present themselves as less lovable and may be perceived as needy, which can repel potential love interests. On the other hand, those who love themselves and are open to outside love may have a greater chance of finding it through timing, chemistry, and common ground.

Ultimately, love is a relative concept, and what works for one person may not work for another. Relationships are unique and can differ from past experiences or the relationships of others. However, what we are all seeking is someone who loves us the way we want to be loved. Love may be complex, but it is also many splendored thing that has the power to bring happiness, joy, and fulfillment to our lives.