The Types of Girlfriends You’ll Need

As much as I respect LGBT, this is not a lesbian article. It’s one of those friendship ones that’ll make you feel all warm inside and possibly call them at 2am in the morning telling them how much they mean to you. You may have your expansive list of friends too, stereotypes and all, but so far this is a list of all the young women I had the pleasure of meeting. Yes, this article may have been based on real people. This is a toast to all great girlfriends out there! Even on days when deadlines are upon us and we feel like throwing all our responsibilities in the air.

1.The Telepath

Because *gives meaningful stare.* We all need someone we can talk to telepathically. If a cute guy passes by, it’s not ethical to just scream “Hey, he has a cute man-bun!” No, we silently stare at each other, stare back at man bun and smile back to one another. The perks of it: you’ll have people wonder what the hell you guys could possibly talk about in looks and one-word convos.

2.The Cutie

This is a given. Why? Because we all need that someone to pinch, cuddle, make fun of, pat on the head for no reason other than the fact that their reactions are adorable. She is called baby girl, cutie, loves, adorbs, and honey. She makes sure everyone has their does of cuteness.

3.The Organizer

Face it, not everyone can multi-task or squeeze everything in in24 hours like she does. She’ll handle every group project and remind you, plan the barkada trip, pass everything on her deadline despite having millions of organizations and still have time for sleep (yeah, right). Despite her busy sched, you’ll know she’ll still have time for a cup of tea.

4.The Selfie Master

Cameras? Check. Adorable pout that she keeps adjusting at every angle? Check. Drags every possible friend in the vicinity for her infinite groufie for the day? Yeah, Double-Check. This girl makes sure you have pictures along with a cheesy line about friendship (#bf5evers!) to brag on every social media site whether you have an account or not.

5.The Existentialist

They come under a variety of names: Philosopher, Sage, Scientist, The All-Knowing, Mental… etc. They have a lot to talk about and they discuss and dissect every single detail about the universe down to the miniscule atom. If you’re feeling smart, debate with them. They’ll welcome any thought with a well-thought “hmmm.”

6.The Joker

Everyone needs a laugh. Whether it’s from a good pun, a bad one, a smack of slapstick humor, disturbing and very censored bathroom humor, or green jokes that never seem to end. She is the destresser. The ever-accompanying joy when you feel just a tiny bit murderous.

7.The Vending Machine

It’s 3pm and the canteen/karenderia/resto/café is just a few blocks away and the hunger pangs are bad. When merienda time comes, you know who to go to for food. For some unknown reason, she is prepared for the worst even on those terrible gut-wrenching-ovaries-are-ripping-their-ways-out PMS days. Chips, chocolates, instant coffee or noodles, multiple viands; she never seems to have an end to her supply. Even for things that are under the basic necessity such as napkins.

8.The Mom

Yes, she exists even when you’ve moved out or are currently staying in a dorm. She will remind you of vitamins, doctor’s appointment or dentist’s checkup, organization duty and will give you a free “motherly” advice about responsibility. Though, she can be a tad bit annoying with her nagging, give her time. She means well.